Turning 25

In few days time I am turning a quarter of a century old. Time passes fast, it seems like just yesterday when I celebrated my 21st birthday, realizing that I am no longer in my early twenties, the thought freaks me out, I don't know why! I do not wish to celebrate my birthday, I couldn't accept the fact that I am turning 25~ Something about 25 is really bothering me, I won't be able to tick on the 18-24 age of group when I filling out the survey form. I have to group myself in the 25- 30. No more calling myself twenty-something..  

Back then when my birthday is approaching, I get excited, I wanted my family and friends to celebrate my birthday with me. But now, when I know my birthday approaching I feel dread, I wish time could slow down, or even stop. 

I have many thoughts running in my mind right now.

I should have achieve something by now but I AM NOT. I am still clueless and lost. My direction towards my life was vague. 

A lot of 'what-if' flowing out from my mind.. What if I learn some skills during my high school time, dancing, singing or acting.. Probably I have talent right now and join the entertainment industry? 

What if I learn foreign language back then? Probably I can become a translator and get to travel to the world. All this makes me full of regrets right now. I am turning 25 and still achieve NOTHING. Feel so shitty right now.. Imma bout to cry! T.T

Topics that surround me now no longer about assignments, coursework, Boyfriend Girlfriend, Yum Cha, bull shit, crap shit, I love you, You love me! It's all about property, houses, car, loan, work, stress, money, commitment, ANTI-AGING CREAM~ WTF!!!! This is sad man.. so sad! Not forgetting also Life Insurance, Medical Insurance, Car Insurance, Investment, Marriage. Politics. BABIES. To be honest, I am not ready for all this. NOT AT ALL~!

Turning 25 to me is a burden, that means I am old enough and wise enough to analyse what's good and bad for me, I am mature enough to settle things by my own. I am independent enough to face everything by myself. Well, although I said I am not ready at all but the circumstances forces me to be one despite I am not willing to face it.

Anyways, I have to admit that I am turning 25 and there's nothing I can do. At this age, is time for me to discover who I really am (Actually that is what I always say to myself every year.. sobz) I should have shown some 'adult' traits instead of acting like a baby. Behave like an adult now because I cannot rely on my parents anymore. 

Let me take a chill pill and thanks for reading. Attached below are some throwback pictures, let me reminisce the old times.

19th 

20th

21st

23rd 

xoxo

Mona