Good Girl Gone Bad

They say you can't turn a bad girl good.
But once a good girl gone bad, she is gone forever.

Good Girl: Most of us refer to as 'girl-next-door'. She has that angel halo with her all the time, spread positive vibes. She dresses conservatively and has good morals and values. She is the kind that all men would die for.

Bad Girl: She is arrogance, she doesn't take any mess from anyone. She doesn't have much girl friend because most of them either jealous of her or they hate her. She dresses what she likes, she speak how she feels.She drinks, she smokes, she party, she plays around!

I was a GOOD GIRL, I was brought up by my parents to be a nice and decent girl. I rarely curse, I behave myself, I know how to carry myself and take care of my own image.

Then some shit happened, asshole out of no where who came and hurt the shit out of me!

I've changed! I activated my Defensive mode. I change the way I dress, I curse sometimes, I party BUT I don't drink, I don't smoke. I never get drunk or high. I've been hurt but I don't revenge on the next guy, I hurt NO ONE! I still have some faith in love and I believe that the right one will eventually appear.

But with my changes, some label me as a BAD GIRL. I show cleavage on some of my selfies, I use the F word. Guy friends constantly ask me to cut down my vulgarity because too much curse would be a turn off , but my girl friends rarely hear me swearing (That's because I use Mandarin to converse with my gf but with my guy friends I use Cantonese, so that explains why the swearing occurs. That is why I don't use Cantonese but my guy friends all BANANA cannot understand Mandarin. Bodoh sia LOL sorry)

So now here's my question. WHAT AM I?

Do you think I am a bad girl now? Or I have some good girl traits? (Actually I don't give a damn, I know myself well.. People who really understand me knows me well.. and I don't need to explain more) But I would like to thanks to my guy friends for the advice, I will cut down on swearing and I accept all the advises given, I change not because of you, I change for a better me!

I wouldn't want to be good girl anymore, however I wanna be a good person. Outlook doesn't determine everything, You Judge Me Based On How I Look, this shows how shallow you are. You assumed I am that kind of person because I portray it that way.. Eh hello, I say Fxxk you, do you think I really go and F around? That is not how you judge a person. Some girls act innocent, PEOPLE assumed she's a virgin. Oh really? Is that so? Some girls party, SOCIETY assumed she is a hoe. People tend to jump into conclusion real quick. I don't blame them for that because it is normal. If I were to meet a guy who is super loaded, handsome and perfect in everything, I would still doubt if he's a player. SO IT IS ABSOLUTELY NORMAL TO HAVE THAT THOUGHT, AND I AM SUPER OK IF YOU THINK I AM A BAD GIRL.    

Now here comes the things that I need to clarify :

As I said earlier, I still have some faith in love.. just a tiny bits. Thus, please do not play with my feeling. Leave me alone if you ain't serious, stay out of me if you just want to play around. It does usually take more than a bad relationship to turn good girl bad, so I have reached my limits. Women tend to seek men as a sense of security, when he viciously break that trust, she will never be the one she was before, she will take more precautions, her guard is up.

A good girl gone bad may not always stay in the bad girl realm, but she will never be the same.
我拿不起 也放不下
Love,

Mona